用户名: 密码: 验证码:    注册 | 忘记密码?
您的位置:主页 > 英语能力 > 翻译 > 笔译 > 练习材料 > 职场 >


2014-05-14    来源:fortune    【      美国外教 在线口语培训


Dear Annie: A little band of women in my office (including me) have been talking about Sheryl Sandberg's campaign to get people to stop calling girls "bossy" when they show leadership traits that would be praised for boys, and we're curious about what you and your readers think. I have been called "bossy" all my life, starting when I was just a kid, right up through performance evaluations at my last employer.

Maybe I'm super sensitive about this, because I don't see myself as bossy, just firm and demanding, the same as my male colleagues. Now, my daughter is getting called bossy by her volleyball teammates, which really bugs me. On the other hand, some women here say that being called bossy is just one of those negative stereotypes we should learn to ignore and rise above. Your thoughts, please? -- Not Bossy, Just the Boss

Dear N.B.J.B.: Your signature sounds like what Beyonce said in her TV ads for Sandberg's crusade ("I'm not bossy. I'm the boss."), a series of spots that also featured Condoleezza Rice and actress Jennifer Garner and kicked off a brief storm of controversy in the press last month. The thinking behind banning "bossy" -- and the reason the effort is co-sponsored by the Girl Scouts of the United States -- is that calling girls like your daughter, but not boys, "bossy" discourages female kids from developing the leadership skills they'll need to succeed as adults.

There's probably some truth to that. "Why is 'bossy' always bad?" asks Gabrielle Adams, who teaches organizational behavior at the London Business School. "Does it have a negative connotation because it's always applied to women? Or is 'bossiness' ascribed to strong women because it's negative?" Either way, she says, the word implies that "someone is assuming, or exercising, authority they're not entitled to. They're overstepping their bounds."
这个观点或许有一定道理。伦敦商学院(London Business School)教授组织行为学的加布里埃尔•亚当斯反问:“‘专横’这个词为什么不好?难道因为它总是用在女性身上,所以带上了负面的涵义?还是因为它有着负面涵义,才被用于形容强势的女性?”她表示,无论是哪种,这个词都在暗示:“有人接受或行使着他们无权享有的权力。他们已经踩过界了。”

When London Business School asked 2,218 women managers if the word had ever been applied to them, 54% said they'd been called bossy at some point, or at more than one point, in their careers.

"A man showing the same traits would probably be called decisive or powerful instead," Adams notes. She points to years of research by Princeton University psychology professor Susan Fiske showing that, while men can be considered both likable and competent, women are perceived as less likable the more competent they are.
亚当斯说:“拥有同样特质的男性可能会被形容为果断或者强势。”她指出,普林斯顿大学(Princeton University)的心理学教授苏珊•菲斯克经过多年调查,发现男性可以同时获得讨人喜欢和能干的印象,而女性越能干就会越不讨人喜欢。

"A woman who is a strong leader is violating what people may regard as 'normal' feminine behavior, which is submissive and self-effacing," says Adams. "That can be unsettling or even threatening, which is why 'bossy' carries such a load of hostility."

So how should women respond? "You can certainly call someone on it if they call you that, and explain why you hold the opinion or take the approach" that earned you the epithet, Adams says. "But that just means that women have to spend more time and energy defending themselves, and justifying their behavior, than men do."

Or do they? Here's where it gets a lot less clear. Nancy Friedberg, a longtime executive coach and president of Career Leverage, often gets called in to large companies to work with male senior managers who "don't get called 'bossy,' but their colleagues do complain that they're 'abrasive' or 'arrogant' or even 'bullying.' It's the same behavior, just described in different terms." (Her favorite HR euphemism for domineering male bosses is "rough around the edges.")
事实果真如此吗?这点就远没有那么明显了。职业生涯规划公司Career Leverage的总裁南希•弗雷德伯格长期为高管提供培训,她经常被邀请去大公司和男性高管打交道,那些人“不会被人说成‘专横’,但他们的同事确实会抱怨他们‘粗鲁’、‘傲慢’甚至‘恃强凌弱’。这是同样的行为,只是用了不同的词语来形容。”(对于那些专横跋扈的男老板,她最喜欢的委婉形容是“不近人情”。)

Whether the difficult person in question is male or female, Friedberg says, the coaching method is the same: Figure out how and why this manager has gotten co-workers' hackles up, and help him or her to alter the offending behavior.

"The most effective leaders of either sex can be assertive and strong while still being respectful," Friedberg says. "They can point out problems and mistakes while still leaving others' dignity intact. Whether you're male or female, being highly controlling or judgmental is what's seen as 'bossy' or 'abrasive' -- and it's not a leadership style that works well for anybody."

By her lights, anyone who is called "bossy" (or "abrasive") would be smart to take a hard look at why others think that. Friedberg recommends going after honest feedback -- either via a formal 360-degree evaluation or, more informally, just by asking around -- with examples of particular instances where one's management style rubbed people the wrong way.

"Most of your coworkers are only too happy to tell you" where you could change or improve, she notes. "Just don't be defensive. Really listen to what they're telling you." Then try to do less of whatever it is that comes across as "bossy" (or bullying).

In rare instances, she adds, she has met women whose authority is resented no matter what they do or how they do it, at which point it may well be time to move to a different company, perhaps one with more women in high places. "It could be a bad cultural fit," she says. "But usually, if people in one organization object to the way you're communicating with them, you'll get the same reaction wherever you go." If that's the case, then simply ignoring being called "bossy," as your officemates say they do, could be the riskiest way to deal with it.

Talkback: Have you ever been called "bossy" if you're a female manager, or the male equivalent if you're a man? How did you respond (if you did)? Leave a comment below.

手机上普特 m.putclub.com 手机上普特
发表评论 查看所有评论
用户名: 密码: 验证码:
  • 推荐文章
  • 资料下载
  • 讲座录音