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世上最动人的情书:贝多芬留给不朽的情人的书信(1)

2015-04-22    来源:网络    【      美国外教 在线口语培训
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当贝多芬去世后,司蒂芬·冯·勃朗宁突然在他的写字台上的一只秘密抽屉里寻出了这几封信。这几封信是纯属偶然得到的。勃朗宁在查阅有关信函、文件时,被附页上的几行显得奇特的字引起了兴趣:“我的思念跑到你那儿去了,我至上的爱人。”

字是用铅笔写成的,字迹差不多完全是用密码的形式写成的,且看不大清楚;这几封信到底是否寄出过,是退了回来,或者只是复写件?也许会成为一个永久的谜。

1812年,贝多芬所尝到的爱情之果,已经不是年轻时的那一种了。至少在过去的6年中,他是希望得到一个永久的结合的。这可以从他渴望一份固定的收入这一点上看到。他祈盼有一个中产阶级式的家庭,特别是在他的耳聋日甚一日的情况之下,他更害怕将来成为一个永久的单身汉。他对于日常生活无力处置,只好将责任放在朋友的肩上;他渴望着有一个富于同情心的女人。他已有31岁了。他的爱情已达到精神境界的最高地步,同时也激发了他所贮存的巨大的能量。《第七交响曲》就是在热恋的5月里完成的。他对所爱的人的处境深表同情,但实际交往情况则不得而知。

My angel, my all, my very self - Only a few words today and at that with pencil (with yours) - Not till tomorrow will my lodgings be definitely determined upon - what a useless waste of time - Why this deep sorrow when necessity speaks - can our love endure except through sacrifices, through not demanding everything from one another; can you change the fact that you are not wholly mine, I not wholly thine - Oh God, look out into the beauties of nature and comfort your heart with that which must be - Love demands everything and that very justly - thus it is to me with you, and to your with me. But you forget so easily that I must live for me and for you; if we were wholly united you would feel the pain of it as little as I - My journey was a fearful one; I did not reach here until 4 o'clock yesterday morning. Lacking horses the post-coach chose another route, but what an awful one; at the stage before the last I was warned not to travel at night; I was made fearful of a forest, but that only made me the more eager - and I was wrong. The coach must need break down on the wretched road, a bottomless mud road. Without such position as I had with me I should have remained stuck in the road. Esterhazy, traveling the usual road here, had the same fate with eight horses that I had with four - Yet I got some pleasure out of it, as I always do when I successfully overcome difficulties - Now a quick change to things internal from things external. We shall surely see each other soon; moreover, today I cannot share with you the thoughts I have had during these last few days touching my own life - If our hearts were always close together, I would have none of these. My heart is full of so many things to say to you - ah - there are moments when I feel that speech amounts to nothing at all - Cheer up - remain my true, my only treasure, my all as I am yours. The gods must send us the rest, what for us must and shall be -

我的安琪儿,我所有的一切,我自己:今天只有这几个字,而且是用铅笔写的,到明天才离开我的房间。这种事是多么的浪费时间啊!为什么要讲这些忧愁的事呢? 我们的爱情怎样才能免去牺牲而继续下去?你可不可以完全属于我,我也完全属于你?呵,请看大自然中的美丽,用一种不可避免的感觉抚慰了你的心。爱是需要一 切的一切,它是不会错的;它是不是存在于你我之间,或我你之间?只有你使我这样的难以忘记,我一定得为你而生存下去。我们可否结合在一起?而你所感到的痛 苦,是否和我的一样大?我的旅程是可怕的,我只在昨天早晨4点才到达了此地,因为他们缺少马匹,所以车子就选择了另一条路线,但那是一条多么可怕的路啊! 在最后一段行程中,他们警告我不要在夜间赶路,但我仍旧继续前行。路面是崎岖的,一条典型的乡间道路,我没有带马车夫;埃斯特海斯走着另一条路,也遭到了 同样的命运。他有8匹马,而我只有4匹。它也给我带来了一些快乐,我们不久即将遇到了。我现在不能完全告诉你过去几天我的思想如何。假使我们的心能结合在 一起,我将不再有这种思想,我心中有许多事情想说。啊!有时我觉得那种言语是无力的,有勇气仍旧有我的真诚,我仅有的宝贝,我所有的一切!!!因为我就是 这么对待妳的-众神一定会圆满我们的爱,对我们来说是必须,也是唯一的爱-


 

 



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