Relationships: opposites do not attract, scientists prove
The theory that opposites attract is a myth, scientists have found, after discovering that people are only attracted to those who hold the same views and values as themselves.
In a finding hailed as a ‘paradigm shift’ for the understanding of relationships, researchers found that like-minded people will be drawn together but keep their distance from those who do not adhere to their beliefs.
It suggests that strangers hoping to hit it off would do better to play to their similarities rather than trying to impress the other person with attributes which make them unique.
To find out how important similarity was to forming relationships researchers from Wellesly and the University of Kansas approached more than 1,500 random pairs, including romantic couples, friends and acquaintances, and asked them to complete a survey about their values, prejudices, attitudes and personality traits.
The information was then compared to see how similar or different each pair was and to see whether people in longer relationships had more in common.
It emerged that all pairings held similar life views even if they had only just met.
In a second experiment, the researchers surveyed pairs who had just met in a college classroom setting, and then surveyed the same pairs later. There was virtually no change in beliefs over time suggesting that if couples go into a relationship hoping to change the opinions of the other it is unlikely to work.
Prof Bahns from Wellesly College said: "Though the idea that partners influence each other is central in relationships research, we have identified a large domain in which friends show very little change-- personality, attitudes and values, and a selection of socially-relevant behaviors."
"To be clear, we do not mean to suggest that social influence doesn't happen in relationships; however, there's little room for influence to occur when partners are similar at the outset of relationships.
"Anything that disrupts the harmony of the relationship--such as areas of disagreement, especially on attitudes, values, or preferences that are important--is likely to persist.
“Change is difficult and unlikely; it's easier to select people who are compatible with your needs and goals from the beginning."
However the researchers warn that the quest for similarity in friends could result in a lack of exposure to other ideas, values and perspectives.
1. compared to 与…相比
The heart is often compared to a pump. 心脏常被比作水泵。
2. in common：adv. sharing equally with another or others 共同的；共有的
3. relevant adj. 相关的；切题的；有重大关系的；有意义的
ADJ Something that is relevant to a situation or person is important or significant in that situation or to that person. 相关的
Is religion still relevant to most people's lives?
4. disrupt vt. 破坏；使瓦解；使分裂；使中断
V-T If someone or something disrupts an event, system, or process, they cause difficulties that prevent it from continuing or operating in a normal way. 妨碍; 扰乱
Anti-war protesters disrupted the debate.
5. compatible adj. 兼容的；能共处的；可并立的
1). ADJ If things, for example systems, ideas, and beliefs, are compatible, they work well together or can exist together successfully. (系统、观点、信念等) 相容的
Free enterprise, he argued, was compatible with Russian values and traditions.
2). ADJ If you say that you are compatible with someone, you mean that you have a good relationship with them because you have similar opinions and interests. 意趣相投的
Mildred and I are very compatible. She's interested in the things that interest me.
3). ADJ If one brand of computer or computer equipment is compatible with another brand, they can be used together and can use the same software. (电脑品牌) 兼容的
Fujitsu took over another American firm, Amdal, to help it to make and sell machines compatible with IBM in the United States.
6. paradigm shift: N a radical change in underlying beliefs or theory 基础信念或理论的根本变化