公主日记 第一册 part 57
The Princess Diaries
【Audio Book】The Princess Diaries
【原版朗读者】Anne Hathaway （安妮·海瑟薇）
Wednesday, Principal Gupta’s Office
Now I know what everyone was looking at outside. I know why they were whispering and giggling. I know why those girls ran out of the bathroom. I know why Josh Richter talked to me.
My picture is on the cover of the Post.
That’s right. The New York Post. Read by millions of New Yorkers daily.
Oh, yeah. I’m dead.
It’s a pretty good picture of me, actually. I guess somebody took it as I was leaving the Plaza Sunday night, after dinner with Grandmère and my dad. I’m going down the steps just outside the revolving door. I’m sort of smiling, only not at the camera. I don’t remember anybody taking my picture, but I guess somebody did.
Superimposed over the photo are the words Princess Amelia, and then in smaller letters New York’s Very Own Royal.
Great. Just great.
Mr. Gianini was the one who figured it out. He said he was walking to catch the subway to work and he saw it on the newsstand. He called my mother. My mom was taking a shower, though, and didn’t hear the phone. Mr. G left a message. But my mom never checks the machine in the morning, because everyone who knows her knows she is not a morning person, so nobody ever calls before noon. When Mr. G called again, she had already left for her studio, where she never answers the phone, because she wears a Walkman when she paints, so she can listen to Howard Stern.
So then Mr. G had no choice but to call my dad at the Plaza, which was pretty nervy of him, if you think about it. According to Mr. G, my dad blew a gasket. He told Mr. G that until he could get there, I should be sent to the principal’s office, where I would be “safe.”
My dad has obviously never met Principal Gupta.
Actually, I shouldn’t say that. She hasn’t been so bad. She showed me the paper and said, kind of sarcastically, but in a nice way, “You might have shared this with me, Mia, when I asked you the other day if everything was all right at home.”
I blushed. “Well,” I said, “I didn’t think anybody would believe me.”
“It is,” Principal Gupta said, “a bit unbelievable.”
That’s what the story on page 2 of the Post said, too. FAIRY TALE COMES TRUE FOR ONE LUCKY NEW YORK KID was how the reporter, one Ms. Carol Fernandez, put it. Like I had won the lottery, or something. Like I should be happy about it.
Ms. Carol Fernandez went on at length about my mom, “the raven-haired avant-garde painter Helen Thermopolis,” and about my dad, “the handsome Prince Phillipe of Genovia,” who’d “successfully battled his way back from a bout of testicular cancer.” Oh, thanks, Carol Fernandez, for letting all of New York know my dad’s only got one you-know-what.
Then she went on to describe me as “the statuesque beauty who is the product of Helen and Phillipe’s tempestuous whirlwind college romance.”
HELLO??? CAROL FERNANDEZ, ARE YOU ON CRACK????
I am NOT a statuesque beauty. Yeah, I’m TALL. I’m way TALL. But I am no beauty. I want what Carol Fernandez has been smoking, if she thinks I’M beautiful.
No wonder everybody was laughing at me. This is SO embarrassing. I mean, really.
Oh, here comes my dad. Boy, does he look mad. . . .
2.morning person 喜欢早起的人 night owel 夜猫子，爱熬夜的人
....which was pretty nervy of him (可真有他的/胆子可真大啊...)
4.blush v.脸红，惭愧，变红， 害臊，怕羞
5.at length 终于， 最后，充分地，详尽地
6.you-know-what 不想直说的事，闲言闲语 （想想每次美剧里面那些爱搬弄是非的人，一开口就是you know what,然后就开始blahblah的说嗨了...）
7.Are you on crack? 原意:你是吸毒了吗? 延伸为:你嗨了吗？你昏头了吗？你疯了吗？