90后社交恐惧 点赞是我最大的主动!网友:扎skr心了

作者:admin

来源:

2018-12-13 16:28

如今,我们生活在一个全球化和信息化的时代,一个社交媒体无孔不入的时代。这些社交平台通过制造一个个热门话题,来引发我们的热烈讨论,我们的社交生活也因此而色彩斑斓。

但是,与此同时,我们之间也变得越来越“陌生“,很多人都患上了社交恐惧,平时在网络上很活跃,但在现实生活中却胆小内敛。

一句话总结:能线上交流,绝不开口说话,哪怕他就在你对面!

对此,网友也是纷纷发言:点赞是我最大的主动了。

你是不是也这样想的呢?那么该如何克服这种“社交恐惧“呢?

1. 学会“暴露“自己

Shy and anxious people are less likely to share about themselves and self-disclose. But real relationships are based upon sharing who you are with your date. Self-disclosure is the gateway to intimacy–it lets you get closer to someone as you both reveal more and more. Self-disclosure is simply telling people what you think, how you feel, and letting them see what matters to you.

内向及焦虑的人一般不太会和他人分享自己的信息或是自我暴露,而这是人和人之间建立比较紧密关系的前提条件。这在亲密关系中尤为重要,也就是说随着你们互相自我暴露的越来越多,两个人也会越来越亲密。所谓自我暴露就是让对方知道你是怎么想的,你的感觉,和让对方知道你在意什么。

2. 不要在意别人对自己的看法

One of the reasons people may not disclose more about themselves is for fear of being judged. The threat of negative evaluation from others is the root of social anxiety, and is exacerbated in a dating setting. Most of the time, anxious daters highly overestimate how harshly their partner is judging them. This is usually because people who are socially anxious tend to have lower self-esteem and make automatic negative assumptions about themselves. Because they judge themselves harshly, they assume others do, too. And it makes them not want to share, be open or be vulnerable.

人们不自我暴露的一个原因,是害怕别人会对自己有看法。来自于他人消极评判的威胁是社交焦虑的来源。大部分时候,社交焦虑的人会过度估计他们的约会对象对他们评价的严苛程度。这是因为社交焦虑的人通常自尊程度较低,倾向于批判自己,因此会认为别人也是持批判的态度看待自己,这种倾向阻碍了他们分享或暴露自己脆弱的一面。

3. 学会接纳自己

When a person feels good about who they are, their values and what they have to offer, and sees their own experience in a compassionate way, it bolsters them against judgment. By calming their harshest critic, their own inner judge, it opens the door to experiencing closer connections with others.

当一个人有积极的自我感觉,觉得自己有价值,也可以给别人提供价值,并且用一种富有同情心的方式来看待自己的经历,这种自我看待方式可以让一个人不再总是批判自己。通过放下他们内心的自我批评,一个人可以逐渐建立和其他人的联系。

4. 提高自己的情商

Mindfulness is a conscious effort to focus on the present moment, the here-and-now. Connecting to the present moment with acceptance rather than judgment leads to greater emotional awareness within oneself. And emotional awareness is one important component of emotional intelligence (EI), or being able to discern one’s own and other people’s emotions and tailor behavior accordingly.

此时此刻,学着专注于当下。用接受的心态来活在当下,而不是一直审视、批判自己,以此给自己带来更好的情感认知。学会识别自己的情绪和他人的情绪,然后以此来调节自己的行为,这都是情商的重要体现。

如果你也恐惧社交,那就赶紧试试这些方法吧!