PART FOUR - LIFE AT MOOR HOUSE
My Past Returns
St. John and I spent many hours together, studying.I had to work very hard to satisfy him. When I was with him I felt that I was losing the freedom to be myself, Jane Eyre, and do the things I liked. St. John always wanted me to be serious. Soon, I never laughed or even smiled. However, St. John seemed to want to be with me all the time, and I discovered that it was not unpleasant.
All this time, I had not forgotten Mr. Rochester. I knew I would love him for the rest of my life. I had written letters to Mr. Briggs and Mr. Fairfax, asking about him, but there was no answer. Soon I lost hope and began to feel unhappy again. Diana said she thought I looked tired, and should go to the ocean for a rest. But St. John thought I should study even more. He gave me more of the Hindustani language to practice. One day St. John and I had stopped our studying and were walking outside. He said to me,"Jane, I'll be leaving for India in six weeks."
"You're serving God, so I'm sure He will protect you," I said.
"But it seems strange to me that my friends won't come with me. Only those who serve God will go to heaven. What do you say to that, Jane?"
"I don't know what to say, St. John. I think--" I said.
"Then I must speak for you!" he interrupted. "Jane, come with me to India and teach the word of God!"
leave for…… 离开……去……