《暮色》有声名著第七章03(中英对照)

作者:admin

来源:

2010-12-29 09:46

《暮色》有声名著第七章03(中英对照)

00:00

贝拉将自己流放到了福克斯这个偏僻且终年阴雨的小镇上。她怎么也想不到,就是这个抉择,让她与他相遇在命运的十字路口。眼神交会的那一瞬,彼此之间已经明白,等待他们的,除了幸福的诱惑,还有危险的深渊。互相倾心的两人,在爱情与危险间摆荡,一起度过新鲜而刺激的每一天,就像久违的阳光一样,洒落在浪漫的暮光之城。

I forced myself to focus on the two most vital questions I had to answer, but I did so unwillingly.

First, I had to decide if it was possible that what Jacob had said about the Cullens could be true.

Immediately my mind responded with a resounding negative. It was silly and morbid to entertain such ridiculous notions. But what, then? I asked myself. There was no rational explanation for how I was alive at this moment. I listed again in my head the things I'd observed myself: the impossible speed and strength, the eye color shifting from black to gold and back again, the inhuman beauty, the pale, frigid skin. And more — small things that registered slowly — how they never seemed to eat, the disturbing grace with which they moved. And the way be sometimes spoke, with unfamiliar cadences and phrases that better fit the style of a turn-of-the-century novel than that of a twenty-first-century classroom. He had skipped class the day we'd done blood typing. He hadn't said no to the beach trip till he heard where we were going. He seemed to know what everyone around him was thinking… except me. He had told me he was the villain, dangerous…

Could the Cullens be vampires?

Well, they were something. Something outside the possibility of rational justification was taking place in front of my incredulous eyes. Whether it be Jacob's cold ones or my own superhero theory, Edward Cullen was not… human. He was something more.

So then — maybe. That would have to be my answer for now.

And then the most important question of all. What was I going to do if it was true?

If Edward was a vampire — I could hardly make myself think the words — then what should I do? Involving someone else was definitely out. I couldn't even believe myself; anyone I told would have me committed.

Only two options seemed practical. The first was to take his advice: to be smart, to avoid him as much as possible. To cancel our plans, to go back to ignoring him as far as I was able. To pretend there was an impenetrably thick glass wall between us in the one class where we were forced together. To tell him to leave me alone — and mean it this time.

I was gripped in a sudden agony of despair as I considered that alternative. My mind rejected the pain, quickly skipping on to the next option.

I could do nothing different. After all, if he was something… sinister, he'd done nothing to hurt me so far. In fact, I would be a dent in Tyler's fender if he hadn't acted so quickly. So quickly, I argued with myself, that it might have been sheer reflexes. But if it was a reflex to save lives, how bad could he be? I retorted. My head spun around in answerless circles.

There was one thing I was sure of, if I was sure of anything. The dark Edward in my dream last night was a reflection only of my fear of the word Jacob had spoken, and not Edward himself. Even so, when I'd screamed out in terror at the werewolf's lunge, it wasn't fear for the wolf that brought the cry of "no" to my lips. It was fear that he would be harmed — even as he called to me with sharp-edged fangs, I feared for him.

And I knew in that I had my answer. I didn't know if there ever was a choice, really. I was already in too deep. Now that I knew — if I knew — I could do nothing about my frightening secret. Because when I thought of him, of his voice, his hypnotic eyes, the magnetic force of his personality, I wanted nothing more than to be with him right now. Even if… but I couldn't think it. Not here, alone in the darkening forest. Not while the rain made it dim as twilight under the canopy and pattered like footsteps across the matted earthen floor. I shivered and rose quickly from my place of concealment, worried that somehow the path would have disappeared with the rain.

But it was there, safe and clear, winding its way out of the dripping green maze. I followed it hastily, my hood pulled close around my face, becoming surprised, as I nearly ran through the trees, at how far I had come. I started to wonder if I was heading out at all, or following the path farther into the confines of the forest. Before I could get too panicky, though, I began to glimpse some open spaces through the webbed branches. And then I could hear a car passing on the street, and I was free, Charlie's lawn stretched out in front of me, the house beckoning me, promising warmth and dry socks.

It was just noon when I got back inside. I went upstairs and got dressed for the day, jeans and a t-shirt, since I was staying indoors. It didn't take too much effort to concentrate on my task for the day, a paper on Macbeth that was due Wednesday. I settled into outlining a rough draft contentedly, more serene than I'd felt since… well, since Thursday afternoon, if I was being honest.

That had always been my way, though. Making decisions was the painful part for me, the part I agonized over. But once the decision was made, I simply followed through — usually with relief that the choice was made. Sometimes the relief was tainted by despair, like my decision to come to Forks. But it was still better than wrestling with the alternatives.

This decision was ridiculously easy to live with. Dangerously easy.

And so the day was quiet, productive — I finished my paper before eight. Charlie came home with a large catch, and I made a mental note to pick up a book of recipes for fish while I was in Seattle next week. The chills that flashed up my spine whenever I thought of that trip were no different than the ones I'd felt before I'd taken my walk with Jacob Black. They should be different, I thought. I should be afraid — I knew I should be, but I couldn't feel the right kind of fear.

I slept dreamlessly that night, exhausted from beginning my day so early, and sleeping so poorly the night before. I woke, for the second time since arriving in Forks, to the bright yellow light of a sunny day. I skipped to the window, stunned to see that there was hardly a cloud in the sky, and those there were just fleecy little white puffs that couldn't possibly be carrying any rain. I opened the window — surprised when it opened silently, without sticking, not having opened it in who knows how many years — and sucked in the relatively dry air. It was nearly warm and hardly windy at all. My blood was electric in my veins.

Charlie was finishing breakfast when I came downstairs, and he picked up on my mood immediately.

"Nice day out," he commented.

"Yes," I agreed with a grin.

He smiled back, his brown eyes crinkling around the edges. When Charlie smiled, it was easier to see why he and my mother had jumped too quickly into an early marriage. Most of the young romantic he'd been in those days had faded before I'd known him, as the curly brown hair — the same color, if not the same texture, as mine — had dwindled, slowly revealing more and more of the shiny skin of his forehead. But when he smiled I could see a little of the man who had run away with Renée when she was just two years older than I was now.

I ate breakfast cheerily, watching the dust moats stirring in the sunlight that streamed in the back window. Charlie called out a goodbye, and I heard the cruiser pull away from the house. I hesitated on my way out the door, hand on my rain jacket. It would be tempting fate to leave it home. With a sigh, I folded it over my arm and stepped out into the brightest light I'd seen in months.


我强迫自己把注意力集中在两个最重要的,我必须解决的问题上,但我实在很不情愿这样做。

首先,我必须作出判断,有没有这种可能,即雅克布所说的关于卡伦一家的事是真的。

我的心立刻作出了强烈的否定回答。用这么荒谬的想法来取乐既愚蠢又神经。但是,那又怎样呢?没有一个合理的解释能说明为什么此时此刻我还活着。我又一次在脑海中列出我自己观察到的东西:不可思议的速度和强壮,从黑色变成金色然后又变回来的眸色,超越常人的美丽,苍白冰冷的肌肤。还有更多——一件件小事慢慢地显露出来——譬如他们似乎从不吃东西,他们的举止优雅地惊人。还有有时候他们说话的方式,那种陌生的抑扬顿挫和遣词用句更适合于一本另一个世纪的小说的风格,而非二十一世纪的教室。我们检测血型那天他翘课了。他一直没说不去海滩之旅,直到他听到我们要去的地方。他似乎知道他周围的每个人都在想些什么……除了我。他告诉过我他是坏人,非常危险……

卡伦一家有可能是吸血鬼吗?

嗯,他们确实是某种东西。某种在合理判断的可能性之外的事情正在我明察秋毫的眼睛前发生着。不管是雅克布所说的冷族还是我自己的超级英雄论,爱德华·卡伦都不会是……人类。他是某种超越人类的存在。

那么——或许吧。这就是我现在能得出的结论。

另一个问题尤为重要。如果这是真的,我要怎么做?

如果爱德华真的是一个吸血鬼——我很难让自己去想这个词——我该怎么办?让别人牵连进来显然是不行的。我甚至不敢相信自己。不管我告诉谁,我都得承担相应的责任。

只有两个选项似乎比较有可行性。第一个是听取他的建议:聪明点,离他远远的。取消我们的计划,回到尽可能无视他的状态。当我们被迫坐在一起上课的时候,假装我们之间有一堵无法穿透的,厚厚的玻璃墙。告诉他离自己远点——而且这一次要表现出来。

当我思考着这个选择的时候,我忽然陷入了一种绝望的痛苦之中。我的心抗拒着这种痛苦,迅速跳到下一个选项。

我什么也不用做。毕竟,就算他是某种……危险的存在,至今他也没做什么伤害我的事。事实上,如果他的动作不是那么快的话,我本来会成为泰勒的挡泥板下的一道凹痕的。这么快,我和自己争论着,这绝对反映了一些问题。但如果这种反映是用来拯救生命的,他能有多坏?我反驳着。我的脑子徒劳无功地转着。

如果我能肯定什么事的话,有一件事情我很肯定。昨晚我梦里的那个黑暗的爱德华只是我对雅克布所说的话而产生的恐惧的表现,并非爱德华本人。虽然如此,当我因为狼人的进攻而惊恐地尖叫出声的时候,我也不是因为害怕狼而从嘴里喊出了“不“。我只是害怕着他可能会受伤——即使他露出锋利的尖牙呼唤着我,我也在为他担心着。
然后我知道,我已经得出答案了。我甚至不知道这里面是否真的有过一个抉择。我已经陷得太深了。我知道——如果我真的知道的话——对于我这个吓人的秘密,我什么也不会做的。因为每当我想起他,想起他的声音,他能够催眠的眼睛,他极具吸引力的个人魅力的时候,我只想立刻和他在一起,除此之外便别无所求了。即使……但我不能再想下去了。不能在这里,独自一人待在越来越黑的森林里想。不能在这个时候,不能在雨水让天边的暮色变得黯淡,滴滴答答的声音就像走过铺着瓷砖的地板的脚步声的时候想。我颤抖着,赶快从我的隐蔽之所站起来,担心着那条小路也许会消失在雨中。

但它仍在那里,安全又清晰,蜿蜒着穿过那片湿漉漉的绿色迷宫。我慌忙沿着小路走回去,我的兜帽拉得很低,垂在我的脸旁。我开始惊慌起来,几乎是跑着穿过树林,因为我觉得已经走了像来时那么远的距离了。我开始怀疑自己是不是已经冲过头了,又或者是沿着小路走到了森林里更远的地方。但在我变得更加惊慌失措以前,透过密密麻麻像蜘蛛网一样的树枝,我隐约能瞥见一些开阔地了。然后我听到了一辆车穿过街道的声音,我自由了。查理的草坪出现在我的面前,那所房子在召唤着我,许诺着温暖以及干燥的袜子。

我走回屋里的时候刚好是正午。我走上楼,换上这一天的装束——牛仔裤和T恤衫——因为我会一直待在家里。全力以赴解决今天的任务不会花上太多的工夫,只是一份周三截止的关于麦克白的论文而已。我心满意足地投入工作,罗列出了一份粗略的草稿。这份宁静的心境是我许久没有感受过的,自从……好吧,自从周四下午以后,如果我足够诚实的话。

不过,这通常是我的风格。做决定对我来说是一个痛苦的过程,一个让我饱受煎熬的过程。不过一旦我作出了决定,我就只会坚持到底——通常还会因为已经做出了选择而倍感宽慰。有时这种宽慰会被失望所破坏,正如我来福克斯的决定。但这仍比为作出选择而苦苦斟酌要好得多。

现在带着这个决定住下来要容易多了,荒谬可笑的容易。危机重重的容易。

这一天就这样平静地过去了,而且效率很高——我在八点前就把论文写完了。查理到家的时候简直就是大丰收。我做了一个备忘录,提醒自己下周到西雅图去的时候记得买一本烹鱼食谱。无论何时我一想到这趟旅程,一阵寒意就会飞快地掠过我的脊柱。但这和我跟雅克布·布莱克散步以前所感到过的寒意没什么不同。我想,它们本来应该有所不同的。我本来应该觉得害怕——我知道我应该这样做的,但我确实感觉不到这种正确的恐惧感。

那天夜里我一夜无梦,睡得很好。因为那一天我起得太早,前一天晚上又睡得太少,耗尽了我的精力。这是我到福克斯以后的第二次,在一个晴朗的早上,在明黄色的光线中醒来。我跳到窗前,惊奇地发现天空里甚至没有半点云影,只有几片小小的羊毛般纯白蓬松的云彩,它们根本不可能带来任何雨水。我推开窗子,惊讶地发现当它打开的时候相当安静,完全没有卡住,一点儿也不像谁知道多少年没开过的样子。我深吸了一口相对比较干爽的空气。外面很暖和,一丝风也没有。我的血液在血管里沸腾着。
当我下楼的时候,查理已经吃完早餐了,他立刻领会到了我的心情。

“适合外出的好天气。“他评价道。

“是的。“我露齿一笑,赞同道。

他冲我一笑,棕色的眼睛弯成了两道弧线。当查理微笑的时候,很容易就能看出来为什么当初他和我妈会闪电般地早婚。那段日子里他曾有过的年轻人的浪漫,大部分在我记事以前就消失殆尽了。正如他卷曲的棕发——和我一样的颜色,即使质地有所不同——已经开始减少了,渐渐显露出越来越多的前额上发亮的肌肤。但当他微笑的时候,我依然可以看到那个和蕾妮一起私奔的男人的影子,那时候她只比我现在大两岁。

我兴高采烈地吃着早餐,看着点点纤尘在从后窗射入的阳光里轻舞飞扬。查理喊了一声再见,然后我听到了巡逻车开走的声音。出门的时候我拿着我的防水夹克,犹豫了一下。把它留在家里是个诱人却关乎命运的举措。我叹了口气,把它搭在手臂上,走进了数月以来我见过的最明媚的阳光里。