《暮色》有声名著第九章02(中英对照)

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2011-1-12 15:39

《暮色》有声名著第九章02(中英对照)

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贝拉将自己流放到了福克斯这个偏僻且终年阴雨的小镇上,她怎么也想不到,就是这个抉择,让她与他相遇在命运的十字路口.眼神交会的那一瞬,彼此之间已经明白,等待他们的,除了幸福的诱惑,还有危险的深渊.互相倾心的两人,在爱情与危险间摆荡,一起度过新鲜而刺激的每一天.

We were both silent then. I watched the headlights twist with the curves of the road. They moved too fast; it didn't look real, it looked like a video game. I was aware of the time slipping away so quickly, like the black road beneath us, and I was hideously afraid that I would never have another chance to be with him like this again — openly, the walls between us gone for once. His words hinted at an end, and I recoiled from the idea. I couldn't waste one minute I had with him.

"Tell me more," I asked desperately, not caring what he said, just so I could hear his voice again.

He looked at me quickly, startled by the change in my tone. "What more do you want to know?"

"Tell me why you hunt animals instead of people," I suggested, my voice still tinged with desperation. I realized my eyes were wet, and I fought against the grief that was trying to overpower me.

"I don't want to be a monster." His voice was very low.

"But animals aren't enough?"

He paused. "I can't be sure, of course, but I'd compare it to living on tofu and soy milk; we call ourselves vegetarians, our little inside joke. It doesn't completely satiate the hunger — or rather thirst. But it keens us strong enough to resist. Most of the time." His tone turned ominous.

"Sometimes it's more difficult than others."

"Is it very difficult for you now?" I asked.

He sighed. "Yes."

"But you're not hungry now," I said confidently — stating, not asking.

"Why do you think that?"

"Your eyes. I told you I had a theory. I've noticed that people — men in particular — are crabbier when they're hungry."

He chuckled. "You are observant, aren't you?"

I didn't answer; I just listened to the sound of his laugh, committing it to memory.

"Were you hunting this weekend, with Emmett?" I asked when it was quiet again.

"Yes." He paused for a second, as if deciding whether or not to say something. "I didn't want to leave, but it was necessary. It's a bit easier to be around you when I'm not thirsty."

"Why didn't you want to leave?"

"It makes me… anxious… to be away from you." His eyes were gentle but intense, and they seemed to be making my bones turn soft. "I wasn't joking when I asked you to try not to fall in the ocean or get run over last Thursday. I was distracted all weekend, worrying about you. And after what happened tonight, I'm surprised that you did make it through a whole weekend unscathed." He shook his head, and then seemed to remember something. "Well, not totally unscathed."

"What?"

"Your hands," he reminded me. I looked down at my palms, at the almost-healed scrapes across the heels of my hands. His eyes missed nothing.

"I fell," I sighed.

"That's what I thought." His lips curved up at the corners. "I suppose, being you, it could have been much worse — and that possibility tormented me the entire time I was away. It was a very long three days. I really got on Emmett's nerves." He smiled ruefully at me.

"Three days? Didn't you just get back today?"

"No, we got back Sunday."

"Then why weren't any of you in school?" I was frustrated, almost angry as I thought of how much disappointment I had suffered because of his absence.

"Well, you asked if the sun hurt me, and it doesn't. But I can't go out in the sunlight — at least, not where anyone can see."

"Why?"

"I'll show you sometime," he promised.

I thought about it for a moment.

"You might have called me," I decided.

He was puzzled. "But I knew you were safe."

"But I didn't know where you were. I —" I hesitated, dropping my eyes.

"What?" His velvety voice was compelling.

"I didn't like it. Not seeing you. It makes me anxious, too." I blushed to be saying this out loud.

He was quiet. I glanced up, apprehensive, and saw that his expression was pained.

"Ah," he groaned quietly. "This is wrong."

I couldn't understand his response. "What did I say?"


"Don't you see, Bella? It's one thing for me to make myself miserable, but a wholly other thing for you to be so involved." He turned his anguished eyes to the road, his words flowing almost too fast for me to understand. "I don't want to hear that you feel that way." His voice was low but urgent. His words cut me. "It's wrong. It's not safe. I'm dangerous, Bella — please, grasp that."

"No." I tried very hard not to look like a sulky child.

"I'm serious," he growled.

"So am I. I told you, it doesn't matter what you are. It's too late."

His voice whipped out, low and harsh. "Never say that."

I bit my lip and was glad he couldn't know how much that hurt. I stared out at the road. We must be close now. He was driving much too fast.

"What are you thinking?" he asked, his voice still raw. I just shook my head, not sure if I could speak. I could feel his gaze on my face, but I kept my eyes forward.

"Are you crying?" He sounded appalled. I hadn't realized the moisture in my eyes had brimmed over. I quickly rubbed my hand across my cheek, and sure enough, traitor tears were there, betraying me.

"No," I said, but my voice cracked.

I saw him reach toward me hesitantly with his right hand, but then he stopped and placed it slowly back on the steering wheel.

"I'm sorry." His voice burned with regret. I knew he wasn't just apologizing for the words that had upset me.

The darkness slipped by us in silence.

"Tell me something," he asked after another minute, and I could hear him struggle to use a lighter tone.

"Yes?"

"What were you thinking tonight, just before I came around the corner? I couldn't understand your expression — you didn't look that scared, you looked like you were concentrating very hard on something."

"I was trying to remember how to incapacitate an attacker — you know, self-defense. I was going to smash his nose into his brain." I thought of the dark-haired man with a surge of hate.

"You were going to fight them?" This upset him. "Didn't you think about running?"

"I fall down a lot when I run," I admitted.

"What about screaming for help?"

"I was getting to that part."

He shook his head. "You were right — I'm definitely fighting fate trying to keep you alive."

I sighed. We were slowing, passing into the boundaries of Forks. It had taken less than twenty minutes.

"Will I see you tomorrow?" I demanded.

"Yes — I have a paper due, too." He smiled. "I'll save you a seat at lunch."

It was silly, after everything we'd been through tonight, how that little promise sent flutters through my stomach, and made me unable to speak.

We were in front of Charlie's house. The lights were on, my truck in its place, everything utterly normal. It was like waking from a dream. He stopped the car, but I didn't move.

"Do you promise to be there tomorrow?"

"I promise."

I considered that for a moment, then nodded. I pulled his jacket off, taking one last whiff.

"You can keep it — you don't have a jacket for tomorrow," he reminded me.

I handed it back to him. "I don't want to have to explain to Charlie."

"Oh, right." He grinned.

I hesitated, my hand on the door handle, trying to prolong the moment.

"Bella?" he asked in a different tone — serious, but hesitant.

"Yes?" I turned back to him too eagerly.

"Will you promise me something?"

"Yes," I said, and instantly regretted my unconditional agreement. What if he asked me to stay away from him? I couldn't keep that promise.

"Don't go into the woods alone."

I stared at him in blank confusion. "Why?"

He frowned, and his eyes were tight as he stared past me out the window.

"I'm not always the most dangerous thing out there. Let's leave it at that."

I shuddered slightly at the sudden bleakness in his voice, but I was relieved. This, at least, was an easy promise to honor. "Whatever you say."

"I'll see you tomorrow," he sighed, and I knew he wanted me to leave now.

"Tomorrow, then." I opened the door unwillingly.

"Bella?" I turned and he was leaning toward me, his pale, glorious face just inches from mine. My heart stopped beating.

"Sleep well," he said. His breath blew in my face, stunning me. It was the same exquisite scent that clung to his jacket, but in a more concentrated form. I blinked, thoroughly dazed. He leaned away.

I was unable to move until my brain had somewhat unscrambled itself. Then I stepped out of the car awkwardly, having to use the frame for support. I thought I heard him chuckle, but the sound was too quiet for me to be certain.

He waited till I had stumbled to the front door, and then I heard his engine quietly rev. I turned to watch the silver car disappear around the corner. I realized it was very cold.

I reached for the key mechanically, unlocked the door, and stepped inside.

Charlie called from the living room. "Bella?"

"Yeah, Dad, it's me." I walked in to see him. He was watching a baseball game.

"You're home early."

"Am I?" I was surprised.

"It's not even eight yet," he told me. "Did you girls have fun?"

"Yeah — it was lots of fun." My head was spinning as I tried to remember all the way back to the girls' night out I had planned. "They both found dresses."

"Are you all right?"

"I'm just tired. I did a lot of walking."

"Well, maybe you should go lie down." He sounded concerned. I wondered what my face looked like.

"I'm just going to call Jessica first."

"Weren't you just with her?" he asked, surprised.

"Yes — but I left my jacket in her car. I want to make sure she brings it tomorrow."

"Well, give her a chance to get home first."

"Right," I agreed.

I went to the kitchen and fell, exhausted, into a chair. I was really feeling dizzy now. I wondered if I was going to go into shock after all. Get a grip, I told myself.

The phone rang suddenly, startling me. I yanked it off the hook.

"Hello?" I asked breathlessly.

"Bella?"

"Hey, Jess, I was just going to call you."

"You made it home?" Her voice was relieved… and surprised.

"Yes. I left my jacket in your car — could you bring it to me tomorrow?"

"Sure. But tell me what happened!" she demanded.

"Um, tomorrow — in Trig, okay?"

She caught on quickly. "Oh, is your dad there?"

"Yes, that's right."

"Okay, I'll talk to you tomorrow, then. Bye!" I could hear the impatience in her voice.

"Bye, Jess."

I walked up the stairs slowly, a heavy stupor clouding my mind. I went through the motions of getting ready for bed without paying any attention to what I was doing. It wasn't until I was in the shower — the water too hot, burning my skin — that I realized I was freezing. I shuddered violently for several minutes before the steaming spray could finally relax my rigid muscles. Then I stood in the shower, too tired to move, until the hot water began to run out.

I stumbled out, wrapping myself securely in a towel, trying to hold the heat from the water in so the aching shivers wouldn't return. I dressed for bed swiftly and climbed under my quilt, curling into a ball, hugging myself to keep warm. A few small shudders trembled through me.

My mind still swirled dizzily, full of images I couldn't understand, and some I fought to repress. Nothing seemed clear at first, but as I fell gradually closer to unconsciousness, a few certainties became evident.

About three things I was absolutely positive. First, Edward was a vampire. Second, there was part of him — and I didn't know how potent that part might be — that thirsted for my blood. And third, I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him.

#p#副标题#e#

然后,我们都沉默了。我看见前灯的光线在路面拐弯的地方扭曲着。它们移动得这样快,看上去一点也不真实,像是某个电视游戏。我意识到,时间过得这么快,就像车下漆黑的路面一样,我心头涌起一股可怕的恐惧感,生怕自己再也没有机会像这样和他在一起了——彼此开诚布公,我们之间的墙消失了,但仅此一次。他的话暗示着一切都结束了,一想到这个念头,我就畏缩起来。我不能再浪费我和他在一起的任何一分钟了。

“告诉我更多的事。“我不顾一切地问道,根本不在乎他说什么,只想再一次听到他的声音。
他飞快地看着我,为我语气的转变而震惊着:“你想要知道更多什么的?“

“告诉我你为什么猎食动物而非人类。“我建议道,声音里依然带着绝望的气息。我意识到自己的眼睛已经潮湿了,我反抗着那阵试图压制我的悲痛。

“我不想成为一个怪物。“他的声音很低。

“但动物并不能让你满足?“

他顿了顿:“当然,我不能肯定。但我可以把它比作靠豆-腐和豆-奶过活。我们称自己为素-食-者,这是我们私底下的小玩笑。这并不能完全满足饥饿——或者说,口渴。大多数时候是这样。“他的语气有所保留。“有些时候,这会比别的时候更困难些。“

“现在这对你来说很困难吗?“我问道。

他叹息着。“是的。“

“但你现在不饿。“我肯定地说——是陈述,而非询问。

“为什么你会这样想呢?“

“你的眼睛。我告诉过你我有一个理论。我注意到人们——尤其是男人——饥饿的时候会更暴躁些。“

他轻笑着:“你是个观-察-家,不是吗?“

我没有回答。我只是听着他的笑声,把它铭刻在记忆里。 “你上周末去狩猎了吗,和艾美特一起?“当我们再次安静下来的时候,我问道。

“是的。“他停顿了一秒,似乎在决定某件事该不该说。“我不想离开,但这很有必要。当我不那么渴的时候,待在你周围会更容易些。“

“为什么你不想离开呢?“

“这让我……不安……因为不在你身边。“他的眼睛很温柔,但有些紧张,它们几乎要让我的骨头都酥了。(。。。)“上周三我要你千万别掉进海里,或者别被绊倒,那不是在开玩笑。整个周末我都心浮气躁,担心着你。而在今晚发生的事以后,我很惊讶,你居然能毫发无损地平安度过整个周末。“他摇了摇头,似乎想起了什么。“好吧,并不是完全毫发无损。“

“什么?“

“你的手。“他提醒我。我低下头看自己的掌心,看见了手腕上那些快愈合了的擦伤。什么都逃不过他的眼睛。

“我摔倒了。“我叹了口气。

“这正是我想到的。“他的嘴角弯了起来。“我料想着,就你来说,情况本来可能会更糟——而这正是在我离开的整个时间里一直折磨着我的痛苦的根源。这真是非常漫长的。艾美特几乎被我烦死了。“他惨兮兮地向我笑着。

“三天?你不是昨天才回来吗?“

“不,我们星期天就回来了。“

“那为什么你们都不回学校呢?“我很沮丧,一想到因为他不在我所经受的那么多的失望的折磨,我就愤愤不平。

“嗯,你问过我阳光会不会伤害我,当然不会。但我不能走到太阳底下——至少,不能在任何会被别人看见的场合。“

“为什么?“
“我会找个时间向你展示的。“他保证道。

我思考了片刻。

“你应该打电话给我的。“我下定决心说道。

他很困惑。“但我知道你很安全。“

“可我不知道你在哪里。我——“我迟疑着,垂下了眼帘。

“什么?“他天鹅绒般的声音催促着。

“我不喜欢这样。见不到你。这也让我很不安。“这样大声地说出来让我羞红了脸。

他很安静。我惴惴不安地向他瞥了一眼,看见了他痛苦的神情。

“啊,“他低声呻吟道。“这是错误的。“

我不能理解他的反应。“我说了什么?“

“你还看不出来吗,贝拉?这完全是两码事:对我来说,是我让自己如此悲惨的;可对你而言,你不应该被牵涉得这么深的。“他移开了写满痛苦的目光,看着路面,他说得太快,我根本不明白他话里的意思。“我不想听到你有这种感觉。“他的声音很低,却很急迫。他的话刺痛了我。“这是错误的。这不安全。我很危险,贝拉——求你了,领会这一点。“

“不。“我非常艰难地努力不让自己看起来像个闹别扭的孩子。

“我是认真的。“他咆哮着。

“我也是。我告诉过你,你是什么根本无关紧要。太迟了。“

他的声音忽然响起来,低沉而刺耳。“永远不要这样说。“

我咬住唇,庆幸他不会知道这有多伤人。我看着车外的路面。现在我们一定快到了。他开得太快了。

“你在想什么?“他问道,声音依然很阴冷。我只是摇摇头,不确定自己能否说得出口。我能感觉到他正凝视着我的脸,但我只是看着前方。

“你在哭吗?“他听起来吓坏了。可我并没有感觉到眼里的液体盈出眼眶。我飞快地用手擦了一下脸颊,确实,叛徒眼泪正在那里,它们出卖了我。

“没有。“我说道,但我的声音嘶哑着。

我看见他迟疑着把右手伸向我,但他停住了,然后慢慢地把手放回了方向盘上。

“我很抱歉。“他的声音被懊悔灼烧着。我知道,他不只是在为刺痛了我的那些话道歉。

黑暗在沉默中从我们中间飞掠而过。

“和我说说话。“又过了一分钟,他要求道。我能听出来,他竭力让自己的语气更轻柔些。

“说什么?“

“今天晚上,在我转过拐角以前,你在想什么?我不明白你的表情——你看上去并不那么害怕,看起来就像是在聚精会神地想着某件事。“

“我在努力回想着要怎样挫败攻击我的人——你知道,防身术。我本来打算猛击他的鼻子,把它打进他的脑袋里的。“我想起了那个黑发男人,不由得一阵厌恶。

“你打算反抗他们?“这让他不安起来。“你没想过逃跑吗?“

“我跑步的时候老是摔倒。“我坦白道。

“那为什么不大声求救呢?“

“我正要那样做。“

他摇了摇头。“你是对的——我确实是在和命运抗争,努力让你活下来。“

我叹了口气。我们开始减速了,穿过了福克斯的边界。总共才花了不到二十分钟的时间。

“我明天能见到你吗?“我请求道。

“能——我也有一篇论文到期要交。“他微笑着。“午餐的时候我会给你留个座位的。“

这太愚蠢了。在我们经历了今晚的每一件事以后,这个小小的承诺居然能让我如此忐忑不安,让我说不出话来。

我们开到了查理的房子前。灯亮着,我的卡车还在老地方,一切完全正常。就好像从梦里醒来一样。他把车停下来,但我没动。

“你保证明天在那里?“

“我保证。“

我思索了片刻,然后点了点头。我把夹克脱下来,吸了最后一口香气。

“你可以留着它——你明天可没有夹克可穿。“他提醒我。

我把它递还给他。“我可不想被迫向查理解释。“

“哦,好吧。“他咧嘴一笑。

我迟疑着,把手放到门柄上,努力拖延着动作。

“贝拉?“他用一种不同寻常的语气问道——严肃,但犹豫。

“嗯?“我太过热切地回过头去看着他。

“你能向我保证一件事吗?“

“好的。“我刚说完,立刻为自己这个太过绝对的同意后悔了。假设他要我远离他呢?我没法信守那样的承诺。

“别再独自一人走到森林里去。“我完全摸不着头脑,困惑地看着他:“为什么?“

他皱起眉,当他的目光越过我看向窗外时,眼神紧绷着。

“在那里我不总是最危险的生物。让我们离它远远的。“

他声音里的阴郁让我微微颤抖着,但我还是很宽慰。至少,这是个容易遵守的承诺。“如你所愿。“

“我们明天见。“他叹了口气。我知道他想让我现在离开。

“那么,明天见。“我不情愿地打开门。

“贝拉。“我回过头来,他向我侧过身子来,他苍白绝伦的面孔离我只有几英寸远。我的心跳停拍了。

“祝你睡得好。“他说着。他的呼吸轻拂着我的脸,让我一阵晕眩。和沾染在他的夹克上的味道一样,一阵甜腻的香气,却更为浓郁。我眨了眨眼,完全陷入了恍惚中。他已经退回去了。


我一直没法挪动步子,直到我的大脑恢复运作为止。我不得不撑着门框,才笨拙地走下了车。我想我听到了他的轻笑声,但这声音太小了,我不能肯定。

他一直等在那里,直到我走到前门那里,被它绊了一下。然后,我听到了他的引擎安静地加速的声音。我转过身去,看见那辆银色的车消失在转角处。我这才意识,现在很冷。

我机械地掏出钥匙,打开门,走进屋里。

查理从起居室那边喊道:“贝拉?“

“是的,爸爸,是我。“我走进去见他。他正在看篮球赛。

“你回来得很早。“

“是吗?“我很惊讶。

“还不到八点呢,“他告诉我。“你们几个女孩子玩得开心吗?“

“是的——太开心了。“我的脑子高速运转着,试图回想起我原本计划的女孩之夜的所有内容。“她们俩都找到了裙子。“

“你还好吧?“

“我只是有点累,我走了很多路。“

“好吧,也许你应该上去躺着。“他听起来有些担心。我想知道我的脸看起来怎么样。

“我想先给杰西卡打个电话。“

“你刚才不是还跟她在一起吗?“他惊讶地问道。

“是的——但我把我的夹克落在她车里了。我想让她明天带给我。“

“好吧,但先让她有机会回到家。“

“好的。“我同意了。

我走进厨房,精疲力竭地坐进一张椅子里。现在我真的觉得头晕目眩起来。我想知道是不是直到现在我才开始震惊得要休克过去。振作起来,我告诉自己。

电话忽然响了起来,把我吓了一跳。我把听筒从座机上拉下来。

“你好?“我屏住呼吸,问道。

“贝拉?“

“嘿,杰西,我正要打电话给你。“

“你到家了?“她的声音听起来很宽慰……也很惊讶。

“是的。我把夹克落在你车上了——你明天能带给我吗?“

“当然,但要告诉我发生了什么事!“她要求道。

“呃,明天吧——三角函数课上,好吗?“

她立刻领会过来。“哦,你爸在那里?“

“是的,没错。“

“好的,我明天拿给你,那么,再见!“我能听出她声音里的急不可耐。

“再见,杰西。“

我慢慢地走上楼,一种沉重的麻木感笼罩着我的头脑。我把睡觉前的准备工作流程过了一遍,却完全没有注意到自己在做什么。直到我淋浴的时候——水太烫了,灼痛了我的肌肤——我才意识到自己快冻僵了。我剧烈地颤抖了好几分钟,直到喷洒下来的水雾最终让我紧绷的肌肉放松下来。而后我站在喷头下,累得根本不想动,直到热水快要用完为止。

我跌跌绊绊地走出来,安心地用浴巾把自己包裹起来,试图把热水带来的热度保留住,这样那种痛苦的颤抖就不会再发生了。我飞快地穿上睡衣,钻到被子底下,蜷缩成球状,紧紧地抱住自己,好让自己暖和些。一阵轻微的颤栗传遍了我的全身。

我的大脑依然让人头晕眼花地旋转着,充斥着我无法理解的画面,还有一些我挣扎着不去看的画面。一开始根本什么也看不清,但当我渐渐失去意识地时候,几张特定的画面清晰起来。

有三件事我非常肯定。第一,爱德华是个吸血鬼。第二,他的某一部分——我不知道这一部分能起的效力有多大——在渴望着我的鲜血。第三,我毫无保留,无可救药地爱上了他。